ANGER Pt IV

Sources of Anger:

· Pride: “They can’t do that to me!” It may be the case that all sinful expressions of anger have their root in the sin or pride. There is a perpetual tendency for most of us to think about ourselves before others. If we can change that, we will lessen our propensity toward anger.
· Injustice: either to us or others (see Righteous Anger, below). There are times when anger motivates us in positive ways, but all too often, when we react in anger, we do so rashly and cause more harm than good. An extreme example are cases of pro-life individuals murdering doctors who perform abortions. Way to get out the pro-life message folks...
· Favoritism: think Joseph (Gen 37 ff) Parents (as well as teachers, bosses, etc.) must always be on guard against favoritism. The end result is almost always resentment on the part of the less favored.
· Unresolved Issues (Transference): “Whoa! Where did that come from?”: "Can" your anger and you will be like a shaken soda can. You have to resolve issues in your past (be them recent or distant) or you will find yourself unloading on innocent people.
· Lack of fulfillment of Real (or Felt) Needs: First off, be careful to discern between real and felt needs. Then, if they are not being met, keep your cool and try to resolve the situation before you fly off the handle. Often times, people who are angry for these reasons have not even bothered to vocalize the need they are angry over. Many times when they do, they find the situation resolved.
On the other hand. In a situation such as employment, it is worth noting than inadequate compensation or workspaces, lack of encouragement or recognition, etc. can breed animosity. In other words, when someone is working for beans, they aren't likely to take much guff from you.
· Unrealistic Expectations: of your self or others: this ties in close the the point above. However, it can also be self-inflicted. If you often catch yourself being critical to your kids, or your mate, or yourself, maybe you just need to lower the bar a rung or two.
A good friend of mine once had a "first shirt", a general, who rose at dawn each day and put in something like 12-14 hours. He expected everyone in his command to do the same and would become downright irate with those who would not. This is an extreme example, but you may have given or received varying degrees of this attitude to/from others. The bottom line: cool off, and ask honestly, "Am I aiming too high?"
· Misplaced Priorities: “chasing the wind”: When we take our eyes off of God and put our efforts into seeking after material and temporal things, the end is most often frustration. God has "set eternity in our heart" and it is only in Him that we find true satisfaction.
· Lack of Reliance on God: Taking on things we weren’t meant to: Thinking back to the person who blows their top all the time that we cover for. There was a time in my life where my chivalry had me immersed in so many peoples' problems that I was no use to any of them. I found myself constantly frustrated with them, and myself. This is a good sign that I am operating on my own strength and or out of God's will. When you are in a situation like this, you might have to turn off your cell phone for a few days and prayerfully consider your investments. You can't help anyone if you are a wreck. Period.
· Life: Just living can put is in situations where we are angry: We just have to watch it. Life happens and there is very little we can do about it. Learn to let go and let God (possibly the ONLY evangelical platitude I still use, and only because it is right on).

Tomorrow: What to Do: Common Sense & Scripture
Friday: Righteous Indignation (A Dangerous Business)